Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

How To Turn Post Traumatic Stress Into Massive Growth

On September 11th, 2001 the twin towers that were the World Trade Center fell. I was there to see it.   Working only a few short blocks away placed me at the epicenter of an event that echoed around the globe, changing the fabric of our culture, and radically altering the trajectory of my life. […]

09-11-2001 WALKING FDR DRIVE

The white and grey ash was now wide upon the highway.  My feet dragging over the road, small stones beneath, while touching a bent guardrail.  Barely moving.  Maybe ten feet to see, thick murk and dark, stepping into nowhere.  Looking ahead others march through the ash clutching their souls, withering, with muted cries and fires […]

A STRANGER TO MYSELF – REMOVING THE MASKS WE WEAR

“I saw all the people behind their masks. I saw through them and there was suffering.” Vincent Van Gogh I always wore a mask, until the mask became me.  Stitched into my skin, and always with one objective, to not reveal me.  Always terrified, and believing I was not worthy, I frantically dressed the part […]

IN THE DARKNESS WE FIND OUR LIGHT

“Et lux in tenebris lucet”- and the light shineth in the darkness. The struggle, laying like scattered gravel on the road.  Moving carefully, I step through the infinite obstacles that make up my life.  Each step different.  Some are heavy, like marching through deep snow, others effortless, like steps in space. The obstacles I have […]

The Magical Power of Connection

Connection, that feeling of knowing I am here, intimately coupled to my essence and to the ever bending and twisting landscape around me, has always been my struggle. As a child, a frozen child, bathed in rivers of fear, and shame, I learned well the art of disconnection, to separate, to live outside of myself, […]

Post Traumatic Stress

  My post-traumatic stress has always felt like being trapped in a block of ice with translucent walls, with the parts that are me scattered like snow dust, laying everywhere and nowhere.  My mind arrested, but supersonic, seemingly functional, but off in many ways, ways that are not noticeable at a glance but become evident […]